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[tactical_alert]

[A handshake is...professional. But impersonal. There are new boundary lines to be drawn, and damn if he wasn't good at seeing where they were to begin with. He clasps York's hand but pulls him in for a brief hug, a clap on the back.]

I haven't touched your things, so everything should still be where you left them.

[goddamngrenades]

[ He probably tip his head down against Mal's hair and clings longer than he should. He doesn't really have a right but- knowing what he might have to do to the other Malcolm.

To Vermont. To himself. It's got him shaken.

York tries to pull himself together and leans back, smile tight. ]

I- thanks Mal. Really.

[tactical_alert]

York. Don't bother with them. If they're still going to melt away--then leave them to their fate. If by some miracle they survive? Then we can figure out what to do after that.

[goddamngrenades]

It hurt her, Mal. It hurt Hayes. I can't just-

[ He scrubs a hand over his face, the same distress a little distant thanks to the first does of the mood stabilizers. ]

I can't do that to you. Not any version of you.

[tactical_alert]

Don't. [Whether he's reiterating the point not to bother or whether he means to not bring that up is unclear. He ushers York in and shuts the door, leaning against it heavily.]

It's only for a short while. We can't go around shooting all of them.

[goddamngrenades]

Just the ones that we can't stand to die that way.

[ But fine- he drops it. And drops down to the nearest sofa, strings cut, emotionally exhausted. ]

[tactical_alert]

...When you say he's me-- [He shouldn't. He knows it.]

I haven't met the other you yet. Would it make you feel better if...I took care of him?

[goddamngrenades]

A you from my world. Agent Vermont. Had an AI Named Phi.

[ Oh god- no. No, no no. ]

No- I'm not- no. I got him. I did it before, last time. It was self defense but-

I've done it before. I can do it again.

[tactical_alert]

[He barks a surprised laugh, covers his mouth, glances away. Vermont. That's...that's a coincidence, there. An AI, too? He can't imagine.]

It shouldn't be on just you. If it's too much, don't force yourself to do it.

[goddamngrenades]

It has to be me. Anyone else would fuck it up. Well- you wouldn't but you don't need to deal with this on top of everything else. I got it.

[tactical_alert]

[He doesn't want to regret bringing York home, but still, frustration already flares up.] You're allowed to put yourself first sometimes, you know. You've had it much worse than I have lately; you don't need to deal with this on top of everything else.

You're not obligated to be anyone's angel of mercy.

[goddamngrenades]

[ His head snaps up at that- mouth open to say something but

Well Malcolm's not wrong. Tense one second he sags back against the sofa, eyes sliding back down to the floor. ]

I've done it before. It's not that hard. You just- point and click. The other me was gonna walk outside the dome and that's not- that's worse. Better that someone just takes care of it for him.

The other you...[ He shakes his head, looking up. ] I don't want you to wrap your head around putting a bullet in your own skull. I know for me it hits a little close to home but- I'm.

[tactical_alert]

You're what? You're you? Tell me where to point my gun and I can shoot. [He doesn't want to bring up the other thems. How horrible that had been. How York had taken care of things.] Let them live or die how they want. You don't have to get involved. I realize it feels like you do, but you don't.

[goddamngrenades]

In a better place now than I was last time. Not by much but by enough.

[ and enough will have to be enough. It's still awful. It'll be awful again- but it won't be as awful. ]

Should I just let them dissolve? It hurt them. You saw how much it hurt them.

[tactical_alert]

And you'll only hurt yourself if you do this. I suppose you find that to be a fair compensation. [He refuses to think of what it would be like were their positions reversed, how much of a hypocrite he'd sound like.] I want you protected. From all of this.

[goddamngrenades]

Kind of wrestling with a little self loathing so- it feels fair. It's not but it feels fair.

[ There, that's one bit out, But the protection thing that-

That has him confused. They were on the rocks, weren't they? Sure they'd hugged but... ]

...Really?

[tactical_alert]

...Yes, really. Just because I'm angry at some of the decisions you've made doesn't mean I want you hurt. I still care. Why do you think I let you back here?

[goddamngrenades]

I- I don't mean that I think you'd want I'm just-

Usually when I fuck things up this bad people wash their hands of me. Except North because being hunted by your former employers kinda bonds you.

[tactical_alert]

Natalia's still planning on being our mediator. I don't think we need a mediator if I was washing my hands of you.

[goddamngrenades]

No, no we wouldn't. [ It's tentative, the hand he streatches to Mal. Tentative and brief. He knows it won't be returned but he wanted to make the effort anyway.

Now that he;s here. Now that he's home? Everything is starting to coil and bubble and sink in. He's offered to shoot himself. To shoot Mal. To Shoot South. To deal with Omega and Sigma. To watch Allison burn all over again. ]

I'm sorry. I'm kind of a mess. I know I have been for awhile.

[tactical_alert]

[It's true, he deliberately ignores the hand. They are better than they were but only enough to be fine with York moving back in. Even if he misses York.]

I know. I'm sorry. These clones aren't going to do anything good for you, either. But if you think ignoring it would weigh on you...

[goddamngrenades]

It would.

[ He laces his fingers together instead, eyes flicking to the far wall. Easier that way. ]

I'm not gonna say i'll be fine afterward or okay but I'm not gonna crawl into a bottle this time.

[tactical_alert]

No, you just might do something else destructive instead. Hopefully you won't. I don't want this to ruin any progress you've made. Sometimes it's all right to put yourself first.

[goddamngrenades]

No- no I won't. I have ways to not. I know it'll- [ He runs his fingers along the inside of his arm, where the second tattoo of Loki's is burned into his skin. ] I won't. I promise I won't.

[tactical_alert]

[That is a motion he notices and it is not a motion he likes. That is a frown. A very firmly set frown.] You don't hurt yourself, do you?

[Best to be very blunt around York, sometimes.]